Mungo's Christmas Eve

I have a plan for tonight and for tomorrow. Christmas Eve will be spent alone watching tv and slowly falling off.

Tomorrow, Christmas Day, will be spent doing much of the same. I asked my beautiful aquaintence, Mallory, what she was doing for Christmas. She said she was treating herself to a day in bed with occational trips to the kitchen. I asked her if I could take her to dinner and she said, "No way, nothing is going to get me out of bed execpt the food that is already in my fridge." Shot down on Christmas by a fellow loner! And she's really gorgeous and single and alone and nice and friendly and we get along. Talk about depressing. My time isn't worth more than her non-refridgerated dairy substitutes.

I got home just a few minutes ago. I was hoping for messages from someone wanting to spend time with me. There was a message on my answering machine and I was overcome with anxious ellation. But the message was from this morning, my manager, calling because I was late for work. What a day. It's supposed to get down to 0.0 degrees tonight or something. It's all starting now, my holiday. Like a bang.

I was talking to my sad friend, Kid Kenny, today. I told him I'd like to find a coffee shop that's open tomorrow and meet a girl in my exact situation. He was confident that all bistros will be closed in observence of yule-tidings. I told him that maybe I'll grab a couple of plastic chairs and a deck table and set them up in front of a Kaladi Brothers and wait for someone. I could even have a second thermos of hot coffee waiting. I SERIOUSLY wonder what kind of sociological results would be yielded from that sort of experiment.

Happy Holidays, Wachels.
Happy Holidays, Jacobsons.
Happy Holidays, Markin.

Peace and Love,
Kershner

Song of the day: "New Heart for Christmas" - Kill Hannah